Law school has started much the way it did last year. I mean for all the confidence I have just from having gone through this before and having done well, I feel like there's enough change that it's been hard for me to protect that confidence. This is largely due to my participation in the on-campus interview process.
I think I've mentioned OCI before, but it's basically where law firms (mostly) interview law students for summer associate positions after their 2L year. Then if the law student does well, the firm will offer them a job for after graduation, and if the law student likes the firm, they accept. It's a really good deal for everyone. Which is only one reason why it is hard to get right now.*
But, I did pretty well last year, and I decided to submit my resume and whatever other materials to 15 firms around the Twin Cities. Why 15 firms? Well, that was the limit imposed on us by our school, and frankly, because I couldn't imagine submitting any more resumes at one time.
I heard back from 3 firms. Well, no. I heard from all of them, but only 3 wanted to interview me. Which was really deflating. I mean, I didn't grade into the top 10% of my class, which (you know) would look really good on my resume. But I did well. And I have legal experience..and whatever. This really isn't the place to tell the world I'm worthy of a job at one of these firms. This is the place where I just say how getting 12 rejections in a short period of time doesn't feel good.
But 3 firms said yes. And that's good. That's something. I've met with two of them thus far and I feel like those interviews went well. I answered questions well. I was genuinely excited about the firms, and hopefully they picked up on that. Hopefully I came off as mature and interesting. Hopefully I seemed smart and they saw from my resume or cover letter or writing sample, or whatever I gave them, that I am a good writer and that I can express myself clearly. Hopefully. But that's a lot of hopefully. Especially when they're looking for a small number of clerks and interviewing a large number of students from more than a few different law schools.
In short, it's a really competitive process. Which I knew, but not quite with the same perspective. For example, today I was reading for a class I have tomorrow, when I noticed a lot of my classmates dressed up very well. And it hit me, these are the people who got interviews I didn't. These are the people who, according to some firm's standard, are better than me. And on the one hand, it makes me feel bad about myself. These people are getting an opportunity that I really wanted. But on the other hand, it just makes me question what the firms were looking for. Was it just grades? Was it law review? Was it some combination? I don't know. And ultimately, it I'm never going to know. I'm looking at 12 different firms who made their decisions based on a myriad of factors and each probably balanced them in their own way. So. Yeah. It is what it is.
But, here's my secret in all of this: I don't think the law firms got it right. I think many of my classmates will be exceptional lawyers, and I wish to take nothing away from their accomplishments. But I know I will work to be a great attorney. And I know if I'm in the right environment, I will succeed.
In many ways, law school has drawn out the competitive person inside me. And I have not been completely sure about how to deal with it. I mean I'm never going to be cut-throat. I'm not the kind of guy who's gonna hide someone's books or what-have-you. But, I want to do well. I want to earn the opportunities that others don't get. And for the most part, I feel like I have been earning them. If not in this particular situation, then certainly in others.
But yeah. It does not feel good to feel like I'm missing out on some really good opportunities.
*Note 1. The other big reason is the economy. Suck.
