You know, I didn't come into this past year thinking I needed to change everything. I just thought about some adjustments I wanted to make to my life. But looking back at where I was a year ago (which has always been something I've liked to do), I've really come a ways this year.
Firstly, I got married. I didn't think it would be such a big change. Dinah and I had been living together for almost 5 years before we got married, so it seemed that all the mysteries were figured out. The little ones are figured out, I think. But there's so much more to it than I thought. And there's something about telling someone in such a formal way that you're not going anywhere, ever, that makes things just enough different. Deeper. I don't know that I can explain it just 6 months in, but I'm liking this.
Also, I've started running somewhat consistently and I've cut 25 pounds off of my body. (I don't like to say lost it, because it makes me feel like I'll find it again someday. Which I might, but I don't need to imply it.) That's a pretty big change. I'm not at the target I set for myself yet, but I'm not far. And truthfully, I feel so much better about my body (though I'm still no pin-up model*) that I don't think I'd feel too bad staying here. So. We'll see.
And yes, I lost my job almost a month ago. Which is a set back. But I'm in school now. I'm gaining skills and accredidation. I'm on the road to something, even if I sometimes lose sight of it and wallow in the fact that I was fired and become bored spending my days doing work that's due in 2 weeks and reviewing my review of the original readings. Here's the truth about the whole being fired thing: I don't miss the job. I miss some of the people. I miss the money. I miss the feeling of accomplishment I sometimes got from my day. I miss being annoyed, because it was my way of making myself feel like I was doing something that was worth being annoyed over, when I really knew it wasn't. So, that's that. Not that they care, but I wish the former employers well. This was probably best for everyone, and I know they've moved on. And I'm in the process. So. Yeah. That's the chapter on that.
I just worry that future employers will look at that chapter and judge me harshly because of it. That's the only thing about how everything went down that bothers me. But all I can do now is fix it so they don't. Oh, and find a job that I like. And there are some out there, so that's good.
Anyhoo. Sorry for the lack of updating.
*They have male pin-up models right? Or do women stop pinning men up after they stop reading Tiger Beat?
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