5

Everyone at work has told me how the wedding day is gonna go and how it's best to deal with the day. "It's gonna go by in the blink of an eye." "The day stretches out and you just enjoy every second of it." "You'll feel so nervous until the booze starts flowing." "Just gotta try to survive. It's not your day anyway." "Just don't drink anything. It's not worth it."
This all at the "congratulations" party they combined with the (somewhat) monthly celebration of work anniversaries and birthdays. (Such a thoughtful gesture, I had completely ruled it out of the realm of probability. They also cut me a check for the wedding. Small, but a nice gesture. Surprisingly nice.) I listened to everyone's advice and thoughts. I mean, I haven't been married before and they have (some 2 or 3 times). They meant well, and some of the advice is good, probably.
I think more than the advice, what they really wanted to do was tell me stories about their weddings. Whenever you tell someone you're getting married, if they are married, sometimes even if they've only been to a wedding, they want to tell you a story about it. They love to tell you how much simpler it was to get married when they got married (even if it was 5 years ago). They love to tell you about their uncles dancing, they're mother-in-law crying or saying inappropriate things. They love to tell you about the preacher (or pastor or officiant) and how they went wayyyy off-script. Or how hot it was in the unairconditioned church. Or how it rained the whole day before, but let up just for a couple hours when they had their ceremony. People love to talk about their wedding day. They don't like to hear about your plans for yours, but whatever.
****
An admission.
I have a metrosexual side that comes out every once in a while. (Hey, why is this buried at the end of a post instead of getting it's own post?) Saturday, I got a manicure and a pedicure. This is my first time getting either of these done, just for the record. Also for the record, it probably won't be my last. (I went, you know, "just so I'll look put together for the wedding", but well...you know.)
I don't know if I've talked too much about the gym in my building at work. It's a small room with three treadmills (one of which doesn't do well when running and another which doesn't have any good pre-set programs, leaving one "good" treadmill for what I want to do. Guess which one the 55 year old ladies choose to use when they need to walk at 4 mph with no incline?), three ellipticals (which one woman stakes out the one closest to the TV for what I think is the Bold and the Beautiful, but also might be General Hospital or Passions) a couple bikes and a stair master. Oh, wait, I just described the stuff I like to use. The gentlemen who are always getting dressed from their showers (when not talking about college basketball, or the security woman with the booming ass [I think that's meant as a positive, but I can't say I want my ass called "booming"]) call that part of the gym, "the lady side". There's also a "man" side with some nautilus machines and free weights.
Anyway, I'm excited to get to the gym today so I can show off my blue toenails. I think that's gonna be the thing that bonds me to the guys.